And was in
other incarnation, was that way a person would be hit by a train but in the
moment the person would be out of the body and God ask me if I want be in the
body at that moment, and I want, the person want to had the own legs smashed.
Once there in spirit I saw a lady, that I would knew was at 40 years I was 20
years, she was driving a car to the train line, was
very far in the past need see the car was different of the ones today was a
calhambeque (rattletrap) but smaller noisy and bumping, nobody today would see
a car look like; I glue at the body in the right moment, I feel like a ink in
the air with hard colors jumping in front of my eyes the legs come liquid, wasn’t
the same of see blood thru in the air was solid red mixture to the solid
material of the car, was spinning like a blender, I mean say crazy but I said
juice, because was super crazy was surreal also the pain, in that moment what
had form get just was like the liquid had color but not form and those legs
that I feel it came just like it, was amazing the body pass for so big brutality,
I get so much humanitarian after the experience, the body could suffer so huge brutality
we are only this perfect machine with the most deep feelings that make us so
humans (the most small mechanisms our machine engineer is microscopic) human
had so deep feelings, pass so many suffer in the loneness. I was take to the
body again for the second that she wake up in the hospital, I only open her
eyes feel the missing legs, I was take without warning all the two times. After
the experience I start paint about all that I feel, wasn’t abstract art I don’t
invented that art was still considered gothic art, was more for exposition that
for sale, was a lot of abstract forms with a lot of strong colors, maybe had a representation
of something in the paint but can’t be just a smashed body in the train line.
My friends know where came the inspiration, and they said to me that I would
look for the woman that lost the legs to talk with her, I said that I would
like it, and also had the fact that I am shy and conversation with a strange
don’t flow easy for me. And they said how we find her I said a amputee of the
both legs 40 years old lady couldn’t be that hard. I think she was from France and
I was from Germany, I pass to stay some time in France and my friends also,
unintentionally I got know that she made a pact with the devil, he was the one
that disconnect her soul from the body, she plotted that was a spiritual group,
just to undercover the Devil, was even the devil that get the car for her, make
a pact with the devil, I thought at the time what a person could want so bad to
amputee the both legs, so after 20 years, I didn’t try find, I just stumble on
it I was just trying be her friend, she didn’t sale her legs for the demon the
pact wasn’t about that, was other thing the demon need an amputee body, people
discover her pact and think she sale her legs in exchange of something, I would
never expose her, it wasn’t that she prefer people think was that the reason
wasn’t, the demon don’t get her legs, the demon want her amputee and not the
legs, she don’t pact her legs, the demon would use her but only after 20 years,
even she didn’t knew how, I would never write that book, was a trilling story but
I would never expose someone. Rute Bezerra de Menezes Gondim
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