A long history

 I don't know if I like to say that history, have a gay soul that said more than 10 times that want kill me, I warn that I revenge of that soul, is that I died murdered. And the gay think that have permission to kill me...

So the end came of the begining, I see in the end a person that I knew in the begining that I didn't told before. He was who offend me. I before got kidnapped I thought that the man return and that one was to kill me. He was my cousin, but he didn't like me. Not from Africa but I don't know he lived in England. Before he kill me he said that I was mullata. I imagine that I had more money, he tried kill me when I was a kid but I run, I was almost sure that he wanted to kill me. So I never see he again, but just in the end. He was racist. Maybe he was son of a cousin of my parents, more far, we just relatives.

We even pose in a picture, when I was 6 years old because, when we meet he change and I. He got transform in a handsome man, and I change also, I never saw he ugly. His eyes were of the same colour of mine. People thought that was so amazing that put me in his arms to take a picture. I was 6 years old and he was 16 years old. We was in a mansion of an in-common relative. When he saw me alone in the garden, he tried to kill me and I came an animal and climb the tree next the house, and got inside the house by the window upper level. 

So I died with 50 years old. Was the incarnation that I lived in Russia. So after my husband tried to return, I went to Engkand to see our sons. In the hotel I there was my cousin and a reporter wanted to take a picture of we two together for the newspaper. He looked mad for me and call me mullata, I said that I didn't mind, and I went to the bar of the hotel, to pass the frieghten that I had. That make me sad I didn't wanted to cry. I said that I would depart in that same day, for the man of the newspaper. And turn back to he leave me alone I was really sad. I was there to see the sons, but thinking that someone call me mullata, I didn't want people to see me with them, I wanted to they be considered white. I knew that they had proud of the mother but I wanted best things for them. So I returned just after to Russia, I didn't wanted to passe a long time in England. I after return to Russia I passed to receive letter fraightening me. I have to say that 10 years before I started to felt that I would be murdered. I just thought that nobody have the righ ot kill someone just because the person was a cretin. I was faithful wife, I givek all to my kids, I let they lived alone in England because I thought that they really like all that freedom. Once I said to the newspaper of France, because my husband after some years of the divorce said, that he returned to France, and the people of there were happy because he was having erections, all the country was happy because arrive someone with erection arrived. The country was broxa? At least one was having erections. Imagine that country being rapped, for that guy with erections. 

So in the time that I was murder, I started to receive firghten letters, and weird occurencies started to happens in the neighboorhood, that impression of being watch, return to my house and things wasn't quite right. I said to a friend that doesn't have a husband at home, have people that have courage to kill us. But I didn't see who was behind the not straight facts. One day when I was in a cake store, he finally appeared, and he sit in front me, and I remembering the frighthen letters, the not straight things happens for where I used to be, like the person knew all my routine and touch everything that I touch. I was looking down because I was to cry. And he I don't know what he pretend to talk with me, sit he had an erection, and said that if I wanted money because of that erection and throw money on me, I said God, and jump of the table pay the enough to cover what I asked and started to walk home, but faster than the normally. And he tried to follow me, and he was to hold my arm in range to leave him alone, but I started to run. I was inside my home thinking that I wasn't safe, that I supposed to leave the country. But inside my bedroom I started to listen the roof being peeled of, I got some clothes and throw in a suitcase, and I dressed very fast, and got down the stairs to got the car to drive away, cars were very expensive but existed, but once I opened the door, there he was in the other side of the street looking to the door, so I run back inside home, and I tried to close the door, but he pushed with violence and I was launched violent in the space when I hit the wall I got almost unconscious. He got my suitcase and me and went to the garage to put me in my car. Inside during the minutes that I listen the roof being ripped off. I notice that I changed, I became another person and became shorter like being 12 years old, so started to cry a lot. We took me to a house that he had or rented that was far from another house. There he rape me, was a month, in a moment I thought that I was pregnant and started to cry to he doesn't got close and he went to a pharmacy to buy abortives for me. When I die he returned me to my home, the police see that even the clothes were from another era. And they realizing that I were a werewolf, imagine that if a man could kill me he also was a werewolf.

Rute Bezerra de Menezes Gondim